Tonight, on Straight from the Gut, my girlfriend (Brittany Rene’) and I discussed the 5 ways to help you get through a tough break up. Straight from the Gut is a live show that I do every Thursday night on Facebook. The show’s concept is about me talking to my younger self. I have overcome life struggles and the lessons I learned along the way I share with the audience. I am a teacher at heart. I enjoy teaching people. I believe that I can give you clarity to help you get through a tough time.
Back to last night’s episode on break ups, we discussed several ways to help you get through those tough times. My mentor, Tony Woodall, has taught me to understand and achieve emotional intelligence. He was a copilot in my life by being with me every single day when I was at my lowest moments in life. At 36, I was very broken. My confidence was gone. I had very little confidence in myself. I have now learned that no matter how bad things get, that my confidence all manifest inside me and not from outside influences.
I have been through so many breakups than anyone else. The hardest part of a break up is coping with the pain. You would be in so much pain that you self-medicate. There are many ways people find these quick fixes to self-medicate. They might do it with alcohol or finding the next rebound to make them feel better.
Here is what I have learned with breakups:
You need to invest first in yourself. What I mean is the mind, the body, the spirit, your entire body. The pain of the break up made me activate a better life. It made me explore my potential. Made me find ways to get better. I got into the gym, lost weight. I was constantly reading and watching self-improvement on YouTube. I have found that we become more motivated by losing something.
You need to become very independent. This is hard and when you encounter a break up, you are immediately trying to replace that void. I made a commitment to myself to prove to myself that I had the discipline. I went 90 days before I tried to replace that person. Time alone will help but you need to improve yourself.
You need to become extremely aware of instant gratification. People want to numb the pain. They may turn to their last partner. Instant gratification leads you from one bad decision to the next bad decision.
What does your partner look like if you would write down their qualities? Write these qualities down on the right side and then on the left side write down if you have those qualities. Like attracts like. So, you are going to only attract what you are at the moment. So take the time to work on yourself.
You’ve got to become who you want to be with in life. You have got to do a cleanse before you start searching for your next partner after a break up. Use that time to work on yourself.
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Hi. I am Tommy Davidson, aka GoodTimeTommy #GTT, and I am a real estate and self improvement entrepreneur in Murfreesboro, TN. I have over 14 years of experience in real estate sales and the past 5 years I have started playing up to my level.
I hired a coach and surrounded myself with those who were better than me. I have read over 1,000 hours of sales training and constantly improving myself daily.